Montague Navarro (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
poisoninmypocket) wrote2015-01-05 08:41 am
poisoninmypocket) wrote2015-01-05 08:41 am
Entry tags:
A Gentleman's Playlist
1. You're a D'Ysquith - Ambition is Born
MONTY: I'm a D'Ysquith.
It would seem I'm a D'Ysquith.
MISS SHINGLE: Montague, I picture you at Highhurst.
MONTY: Yesterday, I was Monty Navarro.
MISS SHINGLE: You could be an earl tomorrow!
MONTY: And Highhurst could be my hurst!
2. I Don't Know What I'd Do Without You - A One-sided Conversation
SIBELLA: I have never met another man who's half as dear as you.
You're so clever, too!
And you make me laugh
More than anybody!
Why are other man so dreary, Monty?
And so deadly dull?
No one holds a conversation half as beautifully as you.
3. Foolish to Think - Rebuilding One's Resolve
MONTY: On a mythical scale
The D'Ysquiths prevail
On a hill just outside of town.
In a castle they love,
That is so far above,
They're accustomed to looking down.
And the family ordains
That the blood in my veins
Is more than a trifle impure.
They conspired with each other,
Condemning poor Mother
To a heartbreaking life she could hardly endure!
With no conscience or care,
They disposed of an heir
To their glorious family tree.
Do I lie down and die,
Or determined to try
To alter the course of my destiny?
Otherwise what will become of me?
Am I foolish to think I could ever be,
Will I never be more than I am today?
I can see me as a man of respect
You could never detect
Had once been so heartlessly cast away!
4. Foolish to Think (Reprise) - The First Murder: Death by Falling
MONTY: But with eight other D'Ysquiths ahead of me,
Their foolish pride survives.
What can I take from the D'Ysquiths?
Except, perhaps...
Except, perhaps...
Except, perhaps, their lives.
Who will look foolish then?
5. Poison In My Pocket - The Second Murder: Death by Drowning
MONTY: Murder's not a hobby for the cautious -
Thoughts of violence can make the timid nauseous.
Unless of course the victim plunges head on through the ice.
It appears that I've been handed quite an opportune solution.
All that still remains is proper execution.
[...]
With the rhythm of a violinist
I am sawing where I think the ice is thinnest
To create a hole through which the tragic lovers meet their doom.
One could call this rather diabolic.
Is it strange to feel a wee bit melancholic?
Right, a twinge of some remorse, of course! A conscience I assume.
But no!
As I'm cutting I am contemplating,
And the truth is it's a tad exhilarating
Even though it's not inconceivable that I'll get caught.
Still, it comes as quite a shock, it
Seems a novice standing here with poison in his pocket
Can decide that murdering is easier than he had thought.
6. Poor Monty - Sibella Marries Another and Downplays Monty's Love
SIBELLA: Poor Monty!
Have I just broken your heart?
Poor Monty!
Am I to blame?
It may look bleak,
But in a week,
I'll wager you'll have forgotten my name.
7. Better with a Man - A View of Male Friendship and Infidelity
MONTY: Women are soft against your skin.
They're awfully nice to nestle with.
HENRY: But when the sport is masculine...
BOTH: You need a man to wrestle with!
Gentlemen have secrets they will never tell,
Oh, they will never tell-
They'll never tell their wives!
HENRY: Married men know there are things you must not say.
BOTH: Discretion is the only way that love survives.
8. Inside Out - Falling in Love with Phoebe
PHOEBE: And when I meet the man for whom I'm fated,
I'll know the one I've waited for is he.
For he will find these wealthy trappings overrated
And he will see what no one sees in me:
A girl who reads the classics and the sonnets
Who needs no folderol, it'll fill her cup.
A girl who thinks a bit beyond her bonnets.
He'll be of gentle heart
And good renown.
He'll be the most admired man in town.
He'll take a world that's mostly upside down
And turn it right side up.
9. Lady Hyacinth Abroad - The Third Murder: Death by Self-Righteous, Imperialistic Missionary Work
MONTY (spoken): If I may your Ladyship, one hears about such terrible poverty in Egypt these days...
HYACINTH (spoken): Egypt! Land of the pharaohs and of Moses the Israelite. Home to the great pyramids and the sphinx. That’s it!
(sung) We’ll populate an orphanage in Cairo,
With foundlings from the reeds along the Nile.
To watch a creature grow,
To swaddle it and know
The joy of its pathetic little smile
ENTOURAGE: It’s little smile!
HYACINTH: The news will travel soon enough to London.
ENTOURAGE: To London!
HYACINTH: Our selflessness will meet with great acclaim.
ENTOURAGE: Huzzah!
HYACINTH: The sniping will be stilled,
And the empire will be filled
With homes for bastard children in my name.
All aboard the Luxor express to Cairo!
MONTY (spoken): And off she went. What I failed to tell her was that a violent uprising against the Empire was imminent and no British citizen was considered safe.
10. The Last One You'd Expect - Overcoming His Past and Struggling with Murder for Once
ASQUITH D'YSQUITH, SR: Some might have thought him unsuitable.
How quickly he's earned my respect.
Who would think that the D'Ysquith we cast aside
Could become such a source of pride?
He's that last one you'd expect!
[...]
MONTY: Only two people left still alive who stand between the Earldom and me.
Only two who survive who are still above me, on the D'Ysquith family tree!
Is the next one my employer, Asquith D'Ysquith? But he has treated me so well.
How ungrateful to remove him after all his kindness. Oh, what hell!
OFFICER (spoken): Pardon me Mr. Navarro. It is my sad duty to report that Lord Asquith D'Ysquith has gone to his great reward.
MONTY (spoken): Oh, no! What's happened?
OFFICER (spoken): Heart attack. At least he did not suffer sir.
MONTY: Only one person left still alive that stands between the Earldom and me!
[...]
ENSEMBLE: Monty Navarro, how have you come so very far?
Monty Navarro, earnest and circumspect.
Monty Navarro, no one knows who you really are!
Who would ever suspect?
11. Sibella - Something Darker from the Gentleman in Love
MONTY: This is the face of a woman a man could easily worship
For all of his days!
But a man could as easily lose his sanity
Deciphering your gaze.
You are vain,
And you are heartless,
And yet,
I can feel in you a shade of sadness
That's barely detectable.
[...]
You see the fate of a man
Who has had the misfortune
To spend his life caught in your sway.
I see Sibella!
My Sibella.
And I like her that way.
12. I've Decided to Marry You - Two Loves for the Gentleman
MONTY: Isn't this madness, who could foresee,
How one trick of timing could ruin it all?
One in the parlour, one in the bedroom,
Nothing between them but me and a wall.
Look at Phoebe, noble and pious, my esteem for her only grows,
But when I am with Phoebe, I am on fire, thinking of
Sibella, full of desire, passion and dare I say it, love!
But when I'm with Sibella, whom do I admire, none but
Phoebe, perfect and lovely, who couldn't love her, heaven knows?
Round and round and round it goes!
13. Poison In My Pocket (Reprise) - The Final Murder: Attempted Murder by Poison
MONTY: I am sitting here with poison in my pocket.
Look who's head head is finally on the block.
It seems that now at last the moment I've been waiting for is here.
[...]
Fish or fowl, it must be well-selected,
So that no one else at all will be affected.
What an awful waste to do in someone I don't want to kill.
14. Stop! Wait! What? - A Murder Conviction (Finally) and Petulance at the Wrong Conviction
MONTY: Stop! Wait! What?!
Well, I didn't kill Adelbert D'Ysquith,
Though that certainly was my intent.
Rather hard to digest
That I could be arrested
For something that I only meant.
And it couldn't be poor Cousin Asquith
For he graciously died on his own.
Was that hole in the ice
Just a bit too precise?
Was my presence at Chisolmire known?
[...]
Stop! Wait! When?!
I should doubt I was seen in the harbor.
Lady Hyacinth fell in so fast.
As for Salome's end
All suspicion would send
Them at once to that backstabbing cast.
Did the bee stings reveal my deception?
Was I seen at the weight lifting hall?
How rude to intrude
On this lovely reception
For I am the Earl after all!
[...]
I've dispatched half a dozen,
Each one a cousin.
All of them quite by design.
It is not a defense
It just makes no sense
This murder was not one of mine!
MONTY: I'm a D'Ysquith.
It would seem I'm a D'Ysquith.
MISS SHINGLE: Montague, I picture you at Highhurst.
MONTY: Yesterday, I was Monty Navarro.
MISS SHINGLE: You could be an earl tomorrow!
MONTY: And Highhurst could be my hurst!
2. I Don't Know What I'd Do Without You - A One-sided Conversation
SIBELLA: I have never met another man who's half as dear as you.
You're so clever, too!
And you make me laugh
More than anybody!
Why are other man so dreary, Monty?
And so deadly dull?
No one holds a conversation half as beautifully as you.
3. Foolish to Think - Rebuilding One's Resolve
MONTY: On a mythical scale
The D'Ysquiths prevail
On a hill just outside of town.
In a castle they love,
That is so far above,
They're accustomed to looking down.
And the family ordains
That the blood in my veins
Is more than a trifle impure.
They conspired with each other,
Condemning poor Mother
To a heartbreaking life she could hardly endure!
With no conscience or care,
They disposed of an heir
To their glorious family tree.
Do I lie down and die,
Or determined to try
To alter the course of my destiny?
Otherwise what will become of me?
Am I foolish to think I could ever be,
Will I never be more than I am today?
I can see me as a man of respect
You could never detect
Had once been so heartlessly cast away!
4. Foolish to Think (Reprise) - The First Murder: Death by Falling
MONTY: But with eight other D'Ysquiths ahead of me,
Their foolish pride survives.
What can I take from the D'Ysquiths?
Except, perhaps...
Except, perhaps...
Except, perhaps, their lives.
Who will look foolish then?
5. Poison In My Pocket - The Second Murder: Death by Drowning
MONTY: Murder's not a hobby for the cautious -
Thoughts of violence can make the timid nauseous.
Unless of course the victim plunges head on through the ice.
It appears that I've been handed quite an opportune solution.
All that still remains is proper execution.
[...]
With the rhythm of a violinist
I am sawing where I think the ice is thinnest
To create a hole through which the tragic lovers meet their doom.
One could call this rather diabolic.
Is it strange to feel a wee bit melancholic?
Right, a twinge of some remorse, of course! A conscience I assume.
But no!
As I'm cutting I am contemplating,
And the truth is it's a tad exhilarating
Even though it's not inconceivable that I'll get caught.
Still, it comes as quite a shock, it
Seems a novice standing here with poison in his pocket
Can decide that murdering is easier than he had thought.
6. Poor Monty - Sibella Marries Another and Downplays Monty's Love
SIBELLA: Poor Monty!
Have I just broken your heart?
Poor Monty!
Am I to blame?
It may look bleak,
But in a week,
I'll wager you'll have forgotten my name.
7. Better with a Man - A View of Male Friendship and Infidelity
MONTY: Women are soft against your skin.
They're awfully nice to nestle with.
HENRY: But when the sport is masculine...
BOTH: You need a man to wrestle with!
Gentlemen have secrets they will never tell,
Oh, they will never tell-
They'll never tell their wives!
HENRY: Married men know there are things you must not say.
BOTH: Discretion is the only way that love survives.
8. Inside Out - Falling in Love with Phoebe
PHOEBE: And when I meet the man for whom I'm fated,
I'll know the one I've waited for is he.
For he will find these wealthy trappings overrated
And he will see what no one sees in me:
A girl who reads the classics and the sonnets
Who needs no folderol, it'll fill her cup.
A girl who thinks a bit beyond her bonnets.
He'll be of gentle heart
And good renown.
He'll be the most admired man in town.
He'll take a world that's mostly upside down
And turn it right side up.
9. Lady Hyacinth Abroad - The Third Murder: Death by Self-Righteous, Imperialistic Missionary Work
MONTY (spoken): If I may your Ladyship, one hears about such terrible poverty in Egypt these days...
HYACINTH (spoken): Egypt! Land of the pharaohs and of Moses the Israelite. Home to the great pyramids and the sphinx. That’s it!
(sung) We’ll populate an orphanage in Cairo,
With foundlings from the reeds along the Nile.
To watch a creature grow,
To swaddle it and know
The joy of its pathetic little smile
ENTOURAGE: It’s little smile!
HYACINTH: The news will travel soon enough to London.
ENTOURAGE: To London!
HYACINTH: Our selflessness will meet with great acclaim.
ENTOURAGE: Huzzah!
HYACINTH: The sniping will be stilled,
And the empire will be filled
With homes for bastard children in my name.
All aboard the Luxor express to Cairo!
MONTY (spoken): And off she went. What I failed to tell her was that a violent uprising against the Empire was imminent and no British citizen was considered safe.
10. The Last One You'd Expect - Overcoming His Past and Struggling with Murder for Once
ASQUITH D'YSQUITH, SR: Some might have thought him unsuitable.
How quickly he's earned my respect.
Who would think that the D'Ysquith we cast aside
Could become such a source of pride?
He's that last one you'd expect!
[...]
MONTY: Only two people left still alive who stand between the Earldom and me.
Only two who survive who are still above me, on the D'Ysquith family tree!
Is the next one my employer, Asquith D'Ysquith? But he has treated me so well.
How ungrateful to remove him after all his kindness. Oh, what hell!
OFFICER (spoken): Pardon me Mr. Navarro. It is my sad duty to report that Lord Asquith D'Ysquith has gone to his great reward.
MONTY (spoken): Oh, no! What's happened?
OFFICER (spoken): Heart attack. At least he did not suffer sir.
MONTY: Only one person left still alive that stands between the Earldom and me!
[...]
ENSEMBLE: Monty Navarro, how have you come so very far?
Monty Navarro, earnest and circumspect.
Monty Navarro, no one knows who you really are!
Who would ever suspect?
11. Sibella - Something Darker from the Gentleman in Love
MONTY: This is the face of a woman a man could easily worship
For all of his days!
But a man could as easily lose his sanity
Deciphering your gaze.
You are vain,
And you are heartless,
And yet,
I can feel in you a shade of sadness
That's barely detectable.
[...]
You see the fate of a man
Who has had the misfortune
To spend his life caught in your sway.
I see Sibella!
My Sibella.
And I like her that way.
12. I've Decided to Marry You - Two Loves for the Gentleman
MONTY: Isn't this madness, who could foresee,
How one trick of timing could ruin it all?
One in the parlour, one in the bedroom,
Nothing between them but me and a wall.
Look at Phoebe, noble and pious, my esteem for her only grows,
But when I am with Phoebe, I am on fire, thinking of
Sibella, full of desire, passion and dare I say it, love!
But when I'm with Sibella, whom do I admire, none but
Phoebe, perfect and lovely, who couldn't love her, heaven knows?
Round and round and round it goes!
13. Poison In My Pocket (Reprise) - The Final Murder: Attempted Murder by Poison
MONTY: I am sitting here with poison in my pocket.
Look who's head head is finally on the block.
It seems that now at last the moment I've been waiting for is here.
[...]
Fish or fowl, it must be well-selected,
So that no one else at all will be affected.
What an awful waste to do in someone I don't want to kill.
14. Stop! Wait! What? - A Murder Conviction (Finally) and Petulance at the Wrong Conviction
MONTY: Stop! Wait! What?!
Well, I didn't kill Adelbert D'Ysquith,
Though that certainly was my intent.
Rather hard to digest
That I could be arrested
For something that I only meant.
And it couldn't be poor Cousin Asquith
For he graciously died on his own.
Was that hole in the ice
Just a bit too precise?
Was my presence at Chisolmire known?
[...]
Stop! Wait! When?!
I should doubt I was seen in the harbor.
Lady Hyacinth fell in so fast.
As for Salome's end
All suspicion would send
Them at once to that backstabbing cast.
Did the bee stings reveal my deception?
Was I seen at the weight lifting hall?
How rude to intrude
On this lovely reception
For I am the Earl after all!
[...]
I've dispatched half a dozen,
Each one a cousin.
All of them quite by design.
It is not a defense
It just makes no sense
This murder was not one of mine!